do you ever KNOW something is wrong, but you dont care and you just do it anyways?
yeahh..
well, i do sometimes.
it has a lot to do with the way i think.
for instance, i let myself fall into thinking about the past and thinking about and reliving regrets...and all it does it bring me down.
but even though i KNOW whats gonna happen, bc ive done it how many times before, i still do it.
and i feel awful.
im so sick of not being strong enough to rise against all this.
ive grown to be pretty strong with physical stuff. but as far as the way i think?

thats still SO hard..

one thing ive come to know is that im NEVER gonna be done growing and changing.
and i think thats a good thing actually.
but that means theres always gonna be SOMETHING that is a challenge for me.
because in challenges you grow.
and in the moments i am weakest, He is strongest.
and in the moments i fall short, He picks me back up.
its so hard for me to admit my shortcomings though..
but its been good for me.
it keeps me accountable.
life.
you cant go it alone.
i should know, after all.
just another example about how i know something but dont act on it..haha
<3